Are You In Fake Love

Jennifer Lee Woods August 28, 2020 Single and Ready to Mingle 740 Comments

Sometimes it can be very hard for us to be able to see clearly in relationships. We think we know it all. No one can tell us different. We know what we know. People don’ see us together, how in love we are with each other. We all have to find out for ourselves, and it’s usually the hard way. We want that relationship to work so badly we have blinders on. I think it’s fair to say we all have had those 1-2 relationships we were in or are currently in where we should have listened to our friends and family.

Ok, so I previously wrote an article on, “10 Signs You’re In Love”, now let’s take a look at 15 signs you’re in “fake” love, or love that isn’t really true love.

They try to change you. This is huge. If someone is truly in love with you, they love all that you are. They don’t want to change you because they think you’re perfect. They accept you for who you are.
You are not a priority in their life. How often do you see them? Do they always have something going on, or some excuse why they are too busy to spend time with you? Do you always hear, “I’m just so busy all the time”. Trust me, if they were in love with you they would want to spend every free minute with you, even if it’s for 30min. just to see your smiling face and give you a kiss.
Your person tries to control you.They try to segregate you from your friends and family. They boss you around. They put things in your head to believe what they want you to believe.
They don’t want you to meet their friends or vice versa. One of the best things about relationships is sharing your person with your friends. If they don’t bring you around their friends, something is up.
They manipulate you.When someone does this they do it out of fear or guilt of something they have done or want you to do. They have an agenda and their trying to exploit it.
They don’t meet you halfway. Love is about sacrifice. If you don’t meet someone in the middle and it’s always about them, their needs, their wants, they don’t truly care about you.
They seem uninterested. Maybe you don’t hear from them that often or at weird random times? Or when you do see them you only spend a couple hours together then they bolt. Is it because they have somewhere else they would rather be?
They appear to be emotionally distant.You feel like your not really connecting with them emotionally, on a deep level. Their keeping you at bay for a reason.
Are your conversations deep? Do you talk about your past experiences, values, or life? Or are your conversations only surface level? What clothes you wear, what hobbies you have, money, places you’ve traveled? Why are you not talking about what you would do to change the world or politics, or your hopes and dreams? Maybe its spoken of once or twice but nothing more than that?
Trust. Do you not trust them? Does something seem off? Do they talk in circles when you ask them something specific? Do you feel like the answers are too quick, fake even?
You have superficial arguments all the time. Two people truly in love, especially in the beginning don’t have little arguments about stupid things.
All they have is empty words. The proof is in the pudding. We can say anything to someone right? If you don’t follow your words with actions your full of shit. Actions always speak louder than words.
Real dates. They don’t take you on real dates. Do you not go anywhere in public? Do they always come up with an excuse why you can’t go to your cities “hot spots”? It’s because their hiding you for some reason or another. All they want to do is “chill at your place”, (just you two). Or why do you only go to “certain” places?
Intuition. We all have it. That feeling that we know something just isn’t right. We can’t quite put our finger on it, but we just know. This is where you are supposed to trust yourself. Your brain is giving you the clues, you just have to make the choice to follow them or not.
The future. When you think about the future do you see them in it? Do you see them spending time with your family? If you have children, do you see them fitting into your family? Do you see yourself married to that person?

Take some time to really evaluate these questions. If the person you think your in love with or falling in love with falls into these areas above, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? Your wasting your time!! Your time is precious, you can’t get this time back. If you even say to yourself, “it’s not a big deal I don’t really have anything else going on” then you need a reality check. We all wish things to be the way we want them to be, but I’m sorry life doesn’t work that way. I wish I would win the lottery, now there’s a wish. But I can’t make that happen by buying hundreds of lottery tickets now can I? No, because I’m just wasting my precious money that I worked hard to earn that I won’t get back if I never win. See my point?

If you have specific questions about your situation, bring it to the forum at, “Ask Jen”